I have mixed emotions about reaching a milestone in my life.

[Tarheel Baptist]

March 31st, I officially retired from Pastoring the church my wife and I helped to plant 42 years ago. We started with literally nothing and saw God do exceeding, abundantly above all we could ask or think. The people were and always have been gracious and generous to us. But, our emotional aftermath of the retirement send off has been mixed…to say the least.

For perspective, when we started with 12 other adults in 1981 our girls were 6 months and 5 years old respectively. Now we have 3 teenage grandchildren who grew up in the ministry. We left behind a church with 1000+ people attending every week….and among those people was almost the entirety of our friendships and acquaintances. My plan is to stay away for 6 months and probably never be a regular attender there again. Sad and difficult but it just goes with the territory.
When your life is cocooned into a ministry, it’s very difficult when you leave it….you don’t feel like a butterfly.

My wife is having a very difficult time and we would appreciate your prayers for His peace, purpose and direction.

 

[voicecrying]

Congrats on the retirement!

 

[Dr. Huk-N-Duck]

March 31st, I officially retired from Pastoring the church my wife and I helped to plant 42 years ago. We started with literally nothing and saw God do exceeding, abundantly above all we could ask or think. The people were and always have been gracious and generous to us. But, our emotional aftermath of the retirement send off has been mixed…to say the least.

For perspective, when we started with 12 other adults in 1981 our girls were 6 months and 5 years old respectively. Now we have 3 teenage grandchildren who grew up in the ministry. We left behind a church with 1000+ people attending every week….and among those people was almost the entirety of our friendships and acquaintances. My plan is to stay away for 6 months and probably never be a regular attender there again. Sad and difficult but it just goes with the territory.
When your life is cocooned into a ministry, it’s very difficult when you leave it….you don’t feel like a butterfly.

My wife is having a very difficult time and we would appreciate your prayers for His peace, purpose and direction.

I’ve known some men in your position in ministry and they struggled at first as well. A couple of them found other churches with similar beliefs and got involved in ministry as a layperson by teaching a regular Sunday school class and filling in the pulpit as needed (on rare occasions). It seemed to give them purpose and an ability to share with others their wisdom and experiences.

 

[abcaines]

Prayers for grace and wisdom.

You bring up a curious (for me) subject. I've seen it almost everywhere I've been involved with a ministry for any length of time and that is, whenever a leader steps down, (for honorable reasons) he "disappears" from the congregation. One pastor in particular, I considered to be a very close friend, stepped down from his position and that was basically the last I saw of him. I was grieved that we as a congregation didn't have him and his friendship around. I've always wondered why that happens. I am wondering if you would be willing to speak to that phenomenon. No obligation, of course. The fact that you are making this move with mixed feelings speaks of a very warm relationship between you and your congregation. I'm sure you're passing the torch to a very capable person. I'm just curious...

 

[Baptist Renegade]

We left behind a church with 1000+ people attending every week….and among those people was almost the entirety of our friendships and acquaintances. My plan is to stay away for 6 months and probably never be a regular attender there again. Sad and difficult but it just goes with the territory.

I am somewhat scratching my head here! Why would you need to leave the congregation likely never to be a "Regular Attender" again? You were the Pastor but this is also your CHURCH FAMILY that you are obviously connected to! Its not just you as I have seen this time and time again regarding pastors and pastoral staff pretty much dropping off the face of the earth upon retiring or leaving a pastorate. Why the disconnect and is such even biblical?

I understand stepping out of the way in order to allow new leadership to operate as the Lord leads them. Perhaps there would be times when they may go a direction you may not particularly agree and this may be difficult for you and could potentially create problems in the Church? I'm sure this Church is "Your Baby" (actually, it is the LORD's and he made you his under-shepherd for a while but I digress) and it would be hard to just let go? Thinking out loud here and trying to understand.

I know that in the IFB world (many SBC as well), the Pastor is a "One Man Show" where his personality is inextricably tied to the Church. This can be an issue during times of transition even in the most ideal of circumstances and it seems that the outgoing pastor typically names his "Heir Apparent" or at least makes such suggestion to the congregation. This recently happened with my old pastor in San Diego (Doug Fisher, Lighthouse Baptist Church) who stepped down for health reasons. When such "Names" his successor, it then becomes easier for the successor to transition in and take over as the Senior Pastor.

I understand the reality of such but do not agree with this practice. This one of the reasons I strongly prefer an eldership-led Church where the Senior "Teaching" Pastor is "First among equals" on a board of elders which collectively leads the Church. In such a scenario, the Senior Teaching Pastor approaching retirement could transition his role to another elder who would work his way in gradually, taking over the lion share of the teaching and preaching and the retiring pastor could remain on the elder board active in the leadership and decision process of the Church so long as he desires or until the LORD takes him home. This Elder in "Retirement" no longer has the burden of being "Senior Pastor" but is still an elder in the Church who is free to do whatever he desires and has a "Church Home" to come to between trips to Hawaii, Yellowstone, or wherever. This seems to have taken place in my old Church in Lancaster, CA (Valley Bible Church) where my old pastor (Dale Whitehead) is still named as an elder but another has assumed the senior "Teaching" role. Obviously they have had a great deal of influence on my thinking today!

I am pushing 60 and looking at retirement myself but my primary focus is upon ENTERING the ministry and serving until the LORD calls me home! Not sure how many in their 60s are working on Seminary degrees but I am about midway through mine and hope to be working on my Master's Thesis this time next year. No "Senior Pastor" role for me though. My wife and I are looking to start a benevolence ministry for communities and local Churches in the Philippines as well as serving in our local Church where focus will be upon personal evangelism and equipping the saints. I also plan on doing a great deal of fishing, travel, and being a Grandpa (Lolo) to all my Grandkids (Apos) and my desire is to encourage each of them to have a passion for the things of the LORD!

I do wish you the absolute best in your retirement years! May the Lord continue to bless and prosper you!

 

[Dr. Huk-N-Duck]

I think it’s pretty common in churches (not just Baptist), for lead pastors to relocate to another church upon retirement. In fact, at the church I grew up in (IFB), it’s actually in the church bylaws that upon retirement, the pastor is legally REQUIRED to move a minimum of thirty miles away and attend a different church. Of course, a church has the ability to vote on this matter and amend the bylaw. The idea is to prevent the former pastor from throwing his weight around when the new pastor takes over, potentially causing a rift between believers.

 

[fishinnut]

March 31st, I officially retired from Pastoring the church my wife and I helped to plant 42 years ago. We started with literally nothing and saw God do exceeding, abundantly above all we could ask or think. The people were and always have been gracious and generous to us. But, our emotional aftermath of the retirement send off has been mixed…to say the least.

For perspective, when we started with 12 other adults in 1981 our girls were 6 months and 5 years old respectively. Now we have 3 teenage grandchildren who grew up in the ministry. We left behind a church with 1000+ people attending every week….and among those people was almost the entirety of our friendships and acquaintances. My plan is to stay away for 6 months and probably never be a regular attender there again. Sad and difficult but it just goes with the territory.
When your life is cocooned into a ministry, it’s very difficult when you leave it….you don’t feel like a butterfly.

My wife is having a very difficult time and we would appreciate your prayers for His peace, purpose and direction.

Prayer outbound.

Seems you are leaving us wondering about why you are leaving, why you do not desire to attend there now & in the future.......Have they not heard of "Pastor Emeritus"?

 

[Baptist Renegade]

I think it’s pretty common in churches (not just Baptist), for lead pastors to relocate to another church upon retirement. In fact, at the church I grew up in (IFB), it’s actually in the church bylaws that upon retirement, the pastor is legally REQUIRED to move a minimum of thirty miles away and attend a different church. Of course, a church has the ability to vote on this matter and amend the bylaw. The idea is to prevent the former pastor from throwing his weight around when the new pastor takes over, potentially causing a rift between believers.

I understand such may be customary among the IFB crowd but I adamantly DISAGREE with such a sentiment! First of all, such is nowhere found in the scriptures! Secondly is what a HARSH way to treat a man (and his family) who has poured his heart and life out in the care of this congregation!

We really need to examine the implications of "throwing your weight around" here!

I understand such in the context of Baptist Churches and it extends far beyond the one who is called a "Senior Pastor!" It also pertains to those who are "Heavy Hitters" who contribute substantially to the finances of the Church and therefore feel they have some sort of "God-Given" right to control things in a Church! Such who love to have the "Preeminence" (Diotrophes, Etc.) often gravitate to positions of Deacon. Elder, Trustee, Etc., and can create a great deal of trouble in a Church! They are the ones who are "Tacitly" in control and none dare cross them because they LOOOOOVE the financial cash-flow from such members! My last Church had such a situation and such chased away the pastor of the Church and it has been almost 5 (!) years since they have had a regular, permanent pastor in place! We left because it was not our problem, we were NOT their "solution," and we NEEDED to be in a healthy Church with a good Pastor!

As I stated, a good Elder-led congregation (that does not have any "Diotrophes" types sitting on the Elder board) should never encounter such a situation! The Pastor would NEVER have so much "pull" and his "power" would always be placed in check with the others on the board of elders to whom they are accountable!

Allow me to reiterate this point, Pastors and pastoral leadership should be MEMBERS of a Church first and foremost! They should be accountable to the congregation and the congregation is someone they should be able to turn to whenever they are facing trials of their own! Perhaps this is one of the reasons so many pastors "Fall into sin" and go off the deep end?

Nothing against you Huk, you simply shed some light upon a very legitimate issue here that needs to be dealt with!

 

[Dr. Huk-N-Duck]

Nothing against you Huk, you simply shed some light upon a very legitimate issue here that needs to be dealt with!

No offense taken, just pointing out what was in the bylaws at my childhood church, and to a less extreme degree, at my current church. As I said, this is not just a Baptist practice. My friend’s father recently retired as a Methodist pastor after being at the same church for something like twenty years. He, too, was required to leave the church upon retirement, although in his case, I think it was for a minimum of a year or two, rather than permanently.

 

[Baptist Renegade]

No offense taken, just pointing out what was in the bylaws at my childhood church, and to a less extreme degree, at my current church. As I said, this is not just a Baptist practice. My friend’s father recently retired as a Methodist pastor after being at the same church for something like twenty years. He, too, was required to leave the church upon retirement, although in his case, I think it was for a minimum of a year or two, rather than permanently.

Methodists are completely different. They are typically an "Episcopal Rule" with a presiding bishop who assigns a pastor to a given Church much like the Roman Catholics do.

I guess another topic of discussion would be what becomes of these pastors when they retire and what is the Church's responsibility for these "Aging Pastors" who no longer have the ability to carry on their pastoral duties?

 

[abcaines]

I am pushing 60 and looking at retirement myself but my primary focus is upon ENTERING the ministry and serving until the LORD calls me home! Not sure how many in their 60s are working on Seminary degrees but I am about midway through mine and hope to be working on my Master's Thesis this time next year. No "Senior Pastor" role for me though. My wife and I are looking to start a benevolence ministry for communities and local Churches in the Philippines as well as serving in our local Church where focus will be upon personal evangelism and equipping the saints.

It seems like you and I are experiencing similar leading. Different means of execution but definitely similar leading.

I am discovering that my role as a chapter president in CMA is good pastoral training in that I am charged before God with the care and guidance of a group of believers who have joined a ministry with the same goal. There are those who are more capable of serving in an official role and others who aren't so much. Some are heavily involved with their own churches (preferable) while for others, we're their only "church" (definitely not preferable). Either way, I have a burden to lead and love these folks and be part of bringing them into a closer walk with the Lord. Sometimes I find myself in a position where a "wolf" has entered the "fold" trying to undo the good work that God is doing and I must confront and protect. I'm also in a position where when another chapter is faltering, availing myself to supporting those who remain. (That's usually the job of an Area Rep(AR) but an AR is only one person.)

All that to say, submitting to God and allowing Him to issue the marching orders when my vocational career is finished, is an adventure. I plan to retire from a "regular job" but I have no desire to slow down until I am no longer physically able to work. What's "retirement" going to look like? IDK. But I am preparing NOW and God is faithfully providing the training that will work toward what I end up doing.

 

[Tarheel Baptist]

Prayer outbound.

Seems you are leaving us wondering about why you are leaving, why you do not desire to attend there now & in the future.......Have they not heard of "Pastor Emeritus"?

I am prayerfully leaving because I’m approaching 73 years of age and things seem to be going well in the ministry…we are thankfully back up to pre-Covid attendance numbers. I have been broaching the subject of my ultimate retirement for a few years now. Two years ago the church voted to transition one of our long time Asst. Pastors into the Senior Pastor position and we began the formal transition process.

It‘s not a matter of desire to attend, it’s a matter of whats best for the ministry. I am the only Pastor they have known for 42 years and statistically and practically, following a long tenured Pastor is often difficult. Our two year process was prayerfully designed to help overcome the normal pitfalls and it seems to have worked very well.

i certainly will attend the church in the future but for a long time I will keep my distance in every way as the ‘new’ pastor gets established. My prayer is that I can and will be used by Him to preach, teach and mentor pastors and churches going forward.

 

[Tarheel Baptist]

Methodists are completely different. They are typically an "Episcopal Rule" with a presiding bishop who assigns a pastor to a given Church much like the Roman Catholics do.

I guess another topic of discussion would be what becomes of these pastors when they retire and what is the Church's responsibility for these "Aging Pastors" who no longer have the ability to carry on their pastoral duties?

Our church has been good to us financially and a part of that is preparing for income in retirement. Since we ‘started from scratch’ in the early days finances were tight as we rented buildings, bought land and built buildings so I was late getting started but the church has always been more than generous. Sadly many Pastors continue to Pastor because they, for whatever reason, cannot afford to retire. Not sur3 how that can be corrected as every church is different.

Finances are a slight concern going forward as we took a huge pay cut but should be ok going forward….we lost 35% of our retirement in the past couple of years thanks to the Biden economic policies.

The best answer is for each Pastor to consider preparing for retirement while they are young….but you know how that goes.

 

[abcaines]

i certainly will attend the church in the future but for a long time I will keep my distance in every way as the ‘new’ pastor gets established. My prayer is that I can and will be used by Him to preach, teach and mentor pastors and churches going forward.

This explains a lot. It may explain why my pastor-friend from back then did what he did. It is good to see pastors step back and allow the "younger generation" step forward. This takes a bit of humility and an understanding that no one is irreplaceable. God bless you and your wife for your service and continued care for the flock.

 

[Tarheel Baptist]

The best leaders can do is to do their best serving God in their generation, and set up the next generation for success. This is what we have tried to do…but is still sad and difficult when it comes to leaving behind your ‘life’s work’.

 

[Billy]

March 31st, I officially retired from Pastoring the church my wife and I helped to plant 42 years ago. We started with literally nothing and saw God do exceeding, abundantly above all we could ask or think. The people were and always have been gracious and generous to us. But, our emotional aftermath of the retirement send off has been mixed…to say the least.

For perspective, when we started with 12 other adults in 1981 our girls were 6 months and 5 years old respectively. Now we have 3 teenage grandchildren who grew up in the ministry. We left behind a church with 1000+ people attending every week….and among those people was almost the entirety of our friendships and acquaintances. My plan is to stay away for 6 months and probably never be a regular attender there again. Sad and difficult but it just goes with the territory.
When your life is cocooned into a ministry, it’s very difficult when you leave it….you don’t feel like a butterfly.

My wife is having a very difficult time and we would appreciate your prayers for His peace, purpose and direction.

Congratulations old man.
Come visit me in Myrtle Beach.

 

[Ransom]

I am somewhat scratching my head here! Why would you need to leave the congregation likely never to be a "Regular Attender" again? You were the Pastor but this is also your CHURCH FAMILY that you are obviously connected to! Its not just you as I have seen this time and time again regarding pastors and pastoral staff pretty much dropping off the face of the earth upon retiring or leaving a pastorate. Why the disconnect and is such even biblical?

When I see stories like this (more or less limited to this forum and IFB churches, though I realize the attitude exists elsewhere), I get the impression that the new leadership of these churches sees the outgoing leaders as competition. Which is ridiculous. Why isn't everyone playing for the same team?

 

[Baptist Renegade]

Sadly many Pastors continue to Pastor because they, for whatever reason, cannot afford to retire. Not sur3 how that can be corrected as every church is different.

This is a huge problem in the Philippines where local pastors are expected to remain "Poor and Humble" and therefore do not have the means to prepare for retirement nor does their congregation have the means to support them as they advance in age and are no longer able to pastor. They have often lived in a parsonage on the Church property which will need to be vacated for the new pastor so they are pretty much cast out into the street with nowhere to go!

My pastor is greatly burdened about this being both a Filipino pastor and a pastor's kid raised in the Philippines. He has a ministry to them and is currently building a "Shepherdsville" to take care of the needs of retiring pastors. I will likely have some involvement with this and my wife has joked about having me "dropped off" there should I outlive her! LOL

 

[subllibrm]

Pastor retired. Another pastor in the area went on sabbatical. Retired pastor filled that pulpit for six months. New pastor and church family drew together. At the end of the sabbatical, retired pastor returned as an honored member of the church. The associate pastor who served under both of those pastors (plus a prior and subsequent pastor) retired and served on the elder board before transitioning to the chairman of the Mercy Deacons Board (we also have an Administrative Deacon Board).

These men have all been and still are good friends. Due to life circumstances (geographical changes) some attend other churches but they are all welcomed warmly when they are able to visit and worship with us.

Note that this is over the course of 25 years. We may have done better in other areas as a congregation but on this subject I believe that the Lord has blessed us deeply with wisdom in handling pastoral changes.

 

[Agent P]

Prayers for grace and wisdom.

You bring up a curious (for me) subject. I've seen it almost everywhere I've been involved with a ministry for any length of time and that is, whenever a leader steps down, (for honorable reasons) he "disappears" from the congregation. One pastor in particular, I considered to be a very close friend, stepped down from his position and that was basically the last I saw of him. I was grieved that we as a congregation didn't have him and his friendship around. I've always wondered why that happens. I am wondering if you would be willing to speak to that phenomenon. No obligation, of course. The fact that you are making this move with mixed feelings speaks of a very warm relationship between you and your congregation. I'm sure you're passing the torch to a very capable person. I'm just curious...

It's considered somewhat of a breach of ministerial ethics to stay around after stepping down from a pastorate, as it creates somewhat of a conflict of interest for the church members and the succeeding pastor. The tendency is that when events such as weddings or especially funerals occur, the former pastor will be sought out to perform these ceremonies and the new pastor ends up being more of a figurehead than anything else.