Case study. In 1990 I left the membership of IFB Church #1 to join IFB Church #2. I asked the pastor of IFB Church #2 if he was going to check with the pastor of IFB Church #1, who was a long-time personal friend of his, about my transfer of membership, and he said No, there was no need for him to do that.
In 1992 when the pastor of IFB Church #2 became abusive of me and started using me as a punching bag, I left and joined IFB Church #3. The pastor of IFB Church #2 was enraged, saying that the pastor of IFB Church #3, also a personal friend, should have checked with him before accepting me as a member. The pastor of IFB Church #2 and his friends bombarded the pastor of IFB Church #3 with contacts, demanding that he revoke my church membership and extradite me back to IFB Church #2 for discipline. I was condemned because I "didn't handle things right," even though in theory it was the pastor of IFB Church #3, not me, who failed to "handle things right." I refused to go back to IFB Church #2 and they excommunicated me, with no cause for that action ever given.
And then people want to know why I am "jaded" with the IFB movement and do not want to go looking for another IFB church. (And yes, I totally agree that not all IFB churches are abusive like this. Maybe someone should put together a directory of non-abusive IFB churches - let's hope it is not a really thin volume).
Meanwhile, the 9 Marks movement teaches that members of affiliated churches are not allowed to leave without permission:
"Sometimes church members who are in the process of discipline will attempt to resign their membership in order to avoid the church’s disciplinary action. Is this something that churches should allow? Definitely not."
Sometimes church members who are in the process of discipline will attempt to resign their membership in order to avoid the church’s disciplinary action. Is this something that churches should allow? Definitely not. Churches shouldn’t allow members to simply resign their membership in order to...
www.9marks.org
"If someone tries to resign mid-process in order to “escape discipline,” should the church just let them go? Of course not. That would defeat the whole point of church discipline. Instead, the church must retain the right to refuse someone’s resignation and send them out another way—through excommunication."
So pastors, just as you pay careful attention to the front door of your church, keep a close eye on the back door, too.
www.9marks.org
Before you join any church, you may want to check to see if they are 9 Marks - "2261 churches found" - 105 in the DC area alone.
www.9marks.org