Please help

Here's the post again.

Sorry this is a bit long.
My wife wanted to foster a teenage girl, a student of hers at Juvenile Hall where she Teaches. Hearing about her for some time now, I agreed. We got her at late 17's. Today our foster daughters Social Worker approached my car window at school. Being unaware of any incident she kept referring to, the back and fourth went on a while. Finally she blurted"she walked in on you naked"  I replied " My wife forgot to tell me I was to take her to school. She had to come into my room to get me"

After more pressure from her, I elaborated. "Fine. I walked to the dresser to get underwear and there she was.We exchanged some words then we took off for school. It was hurried. No biggie". She replied "Good then you won't be kissing her on the cheek as a reward for her misbehaving again? As long as she likes what she sees? It's your ego.."
What in the Name of? I interrupted. Seemed a ridiculous conversation. I called our F.D to get in the car and we left.

The story is. Dressing this morning looked over and our Foster Daughter was standing there staring wide eyed. ""Chris aren't you suppose to be at school?" I asked. "My God, you're so beautiful naked. I mean in general" Replayed it in my head to ensure I heard it correctly. It embarrassed me. The thought crossed my mind she may have bad taste.
I continued getting dressed…when I looked up, she was gone. Entering the living room I saw her sitting on the carpet.
Kneeling to her level, I put my fingers under her chin to make her look up… then said…"thank you. I really appreciate the compliment". Being allergic as she claimed, was not why her eyes were watery.I kissed her on the cheek. "We better go kiddo" I said.

Apparently she relayed this story to a classmate. A friend in her former group home (before begin incarcerated). They share the same worker. She doesn't trust or confide in many people so this isn't going to help. Her other Worker told me a few times, I am treating her like a child. Except she was a child! 17 back then. Now at 18, she's eligible for extended foster care that just kicked in. Seemed too good to be true ...but apparently, she qualifies. We were planning to keep her living with us anyhow.

Because the Worker contacted me, I have to discuss it with her but haven't yet. Not sure what to say? I can't even see it being expedient to bring it up and embarass her. And me.I left a message for the Worker saying I am sorry that I handled it badly. It wont happen again. And if she'd drop it, I'd be greatful. Thanks for being her worker. We appreciate you.

This is so par to the course.

I think I handled it badly. Oh yeah, The Worker said I should have covered up quickly but that would have made her feel bad, that she embarrassed me. Hurt me. So to not upset her, I just acted normal. She's a very stable, nice girl. Thoughts?

Feel free to keep us in your prayers. I hope there isn't alot of gossip ensuing via messages to each other to attempt to misalign me. But if so, oh welll. I will pray for you all also.  Goodnight
 
Aleshanee I read your first sentence and will not be continuing further. Only one person so far, has actually addressed my request for advice, with added criticisms yes. And maybe out of concern for our F.D but either way, it shows integrity. I need to examine myself due to that one post.

The comment about "I was skinny dipping with friends" is the perfect example of those with depraved minds spinning truth into erotic stories. That thread about nudity(another forum) from many years ago was permiated with posters linking all nudity to the X rated.

Despite my example, that my friends and I ride hard, thus swam naked to cool off, wasn't racy enough. So it got spun into what Alayman has posted (and beyond, btw) into "I skinny dip for fun with friends". Really, who cares anyhow unless your a perv? Honestly only perverts care to keep these threads going for the purpose of spinning it and spinning it. More and more x rated.

Anyone skinny dipping with friends I do not begrudge since it is not sin anyhow. Nor do I care

Not to mention when you present something as sin, and it's not sin in and of itself, those who deem themselves Saved wouldn't pay it any mind. Scripture is our authority.

It's after midnight. I need to get up and work tomorrow. Goodnight for good.





 
Biker said:
Here's the post again.

Sorry this is a bit long.
My wife wanted to foster a teenage girl, a student of hers at Juvenile Hall where she Teaches. Hearing about her for some time now, I agreed. We got her at late 17's. Today our foster daughters Social Worker approached my car window at school. Being unaware of any incident she kept referring to, the back and fourth went on a while. Finally she blurted"she walked in on you naked"  I replied " My wife forgot to tell me I was to take her to school. She had to come into my room to get me"

After more pressure from her, I elaborated. "Fine. I walked to the dresser to get underwear and there she was.We exchanged some words then we took off for school. It was hurried. No biggie". She replied "Good then you won't be kissing her on the cheek as a reward for her misbehaving again? As long as she likes what she sees? It's your ego.."
What in the Name of? I interrupted. Seemed a ridiculous conversation. I called our F.D to get in the car and we left.

The story is. Dressing this morning looked over and our Foster Daughter was standing there staring wide eyed. ""Chris aren't you suppose to be at school?" I asked. "My God, you're so beautiful naked. I mean in general" Replayed it in my head to ensure I heard it correctly. It embarrassed me. The thought crossed my mind she may have bad taste.
I continued getting dressed…when I looked up, she was gone. Entering the living room I saw her sitting on the carpet.
Kneeling to her level, I put my fingers under her chin to make her look up… then said…"thank you. I really appreciate the compliment". Being allergic as she claimed, was not why her eyes were watery.I kissed her on the cheek. "We better go kiddo" I said.

Apparently she relayed this story to a classmate. A friend in her former group home (before begin incarcerated). They share the same worker. She doesn't trust or confide in many people so this isn't going to help. Her other Worker told me a few times, I am treating her like a child. Except she was a child! 17 back then. Now at 18, she's eligible for extended foster care that just kicked in. Seemed too good to be true ...but apparently, she qualifies. We were planning to keep her living with us anyhow.

Because the Worker contacted me, I have to discuss it with her but haven't yet. Not sure what to say? I can't even see it being expedient to bring it up and embarass her. And me.I left a message for the Worker saying I am sorry that I handled it badly. It wont happen again. And if she'd drop it, I'd be greatful. Thanks for being her worker. We appreciate you.

This is so par to the course.

I think I handled it badly. Oh yeah, The Worker said I should have covered up quickly but that would have made her feel bad, that she embarrassed me. Hurt me. So to not upset her, I just acted normal. She's a very stable, nice girl. Thoughts?

Feel free to keep us in your prayers. I hope there isn't alot of gossip ensuing via messages to each other to attempt to misalign me. But if so, oh welll. I will pray for you all also.  Goodnight
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I pray the authorities remove the girl from girl from your care .and you are prosecuted for your deviant behavior. Also apparently someone here posted your name at the start of this thread, if indeed they know your identity they should report you to the local authorities. Alo the admins have his email address so they should turn this information to the proper authorities. Hopefully they will do the right thing.
 
Biker said:
That has never happened. As a hardcore racer (cyclist), living in the Endurance Capitol of the World, we did remove clothing to cool off in the river DURING bike rides. To avoid heat exhaustion and to rinse the sweat off.

Just as people shower in the Military or at the Gym (which I couldn't do due to the close proximity to other naked men) we showered naturally in the HUGE American River.
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It's odd enough that you would voluntarily expose your nakedness to other adult men, but that you regularly have stories that revolve around exposure is what people find troubling, and now you've introduced a female minor into the equation.  Were your skinny-dipping episodes always only done in the presence of males, or were there female cyclists/friends gettin' jiggy wit it too?
 
I haven't read the whole thread.  Has anyone asked how your wife feels about the whole episode? 
 
I don't believe God would want people skinny dipping together. Just my conviction I suppose. You can blame us for X-rated minds, but your post is presenting a questionable situation. I have five children, and if someone ever even open the door an inch I yell out, "I'm in here!" and quickly cover up while pushing the door shut. I don't even allow their eyes to see me.

I understand that you believed yourself to be alone. But, what I don't understand is how this child even had time to comment on your "body" ... you seem to have a comfort with your body. This is a comfort not many share.

My advise for you is that you stop seeking advise from here and seek out some real friends. Your pastor perhaps. And, while it is on my mind .... ask him is he would be comfortable skinny dipping with you.
 
Alashanee is 100% on the mark. I am not backing down from my previous post. You have a problem. I can't decide if you make these stories up to get your kicks or if you actually do the things you post, but dude, it's not cool.
 
Biker said:
Only one person so far, has actually addressed my request for advice
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That's not true.  I gave you advice and so did a few others.  Get that girl out of your house, for her own safety.  You don't even know how to react appropriately when a teenage girl who is not even family walks in on you naked.  Yes, you should have covered up and told her in no uncertain terms that one never enters another's bedroom without knocking and gaining permission first. 

Truth is, Biker, I have serious doubts that this story is even true.  I mostly think it was dreamed up in your own sick fantasy. 
 
Biker said:
At least JR CHURCH cared enough about our Foster Child to give advice. I assume it wasn't for my benefit but for hers.
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I tried to show some restraint in my post because I wanted you to focus on what is best for the young lady.  Frankly, I am concerned for her.  No need to respond to my next statement because rationalization or excuses are useless:

Please, please, take a sober look at your inner thoughts toward this girl. 

Setting aside the actual encounter in your bedroom, which you admit was not handled correctly, I perceive some glaring indications (from your own words) that you have serious issues with her in your mind. 

Examine yourself, Biker.  This is not about what fellow-FFFers think about you, this is about her life and future.  Do the right thing.
 
Biker said:
ThatGirl said:
I couldn't agree more, OZZY.  I seem to recall this same person posting many odd and perverted topics in the past, not the least of which was a confession of having the hots for his step mother.  I wish we knew who to contact to warn them about the dangers of leaving this young impressionable girl in that home. 
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Your only post to me (Your post #14) is a sexual innuendo. Cartoon. I don't post to you.

Now you are making another sexual innuendo linking it to an attraction I once felt for my new Stepmom yrs back

Not sure how you missed it but this thread is asking for advice upon how I could've done better. How badly it was handled. Nothing more
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Sexual innuendo?  LOL!  In your dreams chicken boy.  There is no innuendo, no insinuation.  I remember very vividly the long post you made about your stepmom and how you longed to kiss her and she was hot for you.  You have issues.  Folks have tried to tell you and you make excuses for your behavior, you try to justify it.  But now we're talking about a young impressionable girl.  If there is any truth to your story at all and you truly want to do right by her then you will remove her from your "care".  Because I honestly believe that deep inside of you is a predator.  You may or may not have ever acted on it but there are all kinds of red flags all over this incident. 
 
Biker said:
Here's the post again.

Sorry this is a bit long.
My wife wanted to foster a teenage girl, a student of hers at Juvenile Hall where she Teaches. Hearing about her for some time now, I agreed. We got her at late 17's. Today our foster daughters Social Worker approached my car window at school. Being unaware of any incident she kept referring to, the back and fourth went on a while. Finally she blurted"she walked in on you naked"  I replied " My wife forgot to tell me I was to take her to school. She had to come into my room to get me"

After more pressure from her, I elaborated. "Fine. I walked to the dresser to get underwear and there she was.We exchanged some words then we took off for school. It was hurried. No biggie". She replied "Good then you won't be kissing her on the cheek as a reward for her misbehaving again? As long as she likes what she sees? It's your ego.."
What in the Name of? I interrupted. Seemed a ridiculous conversation. I called our F.D to get in the car and we left.

The story is. Dressing this morning looked over and our Foster Daughter was standing there staring wide eyed. ""Chris aren't you suppose to be at school?" I asked. "My God, you're so beautiful naked. I mean in general" Replayed it in my head to ensure I heard it correctly. It embarrassed me. The thought crossed my mind she may have bad taste.
I continued getting dressed…when I looked up, she was gone. Entering the living room I saw her sitting on the carpet.
Kneeling to her level, I put my fingers under her chin to make her look up… then said…"thank you. I really appreciate the compliment". Being allergic as she claimed, was not why her eyes were watery.I kissed her on the cheek. "We better go kiddo" I said.

Apparently she relayed this story to a classmate. A friend in her former group home (before begin incarcerated). They share the same worker. She doesn't trust or confide in many people so this isn't going to help. Her other Worker told me a few times, I am treating her like a child. Except she was a child! 17 back then. Now at 18, she's eligible for extended foster care that just kicked in. Seemed too good to be true ...but apparently, she qualifies. We were planning to keep her living with us anyhow.

Because the Worker contacted me, I have to discuss it with her but haven't yet. Not sure what to say? I can't even see it being expedient to bring it up and embarass her. And me.I left a message for the Worker saying I am sorry that I handled it badly. It wont happen again. And if she'd drop it, I'd be greatful. Thanks for being her worker. We appreciate you.

This is so par to the course.

I think I handled it badly. Oh yeah, The Worker said I should have covered up quickly but that would have made her feel bad, that she embarrassed me. Hurt me. So to not upset her, I just acted normal. She's a very stable, nice girl. Thoughts?
Click to expand...

I would not let you watch my dog!
 
Quote: "I think I handled it badly. Oh yeah, The Worker said I should have covered up quickly but that would have made her feel bad, that she embarrassed me. Hurt me. So to not upset her, I just acted normal. She's a very stable, nice girl. Thoughts?"

Dude, this is where you have a really bad problem. The worker said you should have covered up quickly, but you didn't. You said you acted normal. Guess what? That is not normal. When you are naked and someone walks in on you who isn't your spouse, normal is to be embarrassed and cover up quickly, 'cuz they ain't supposed to see you au natural. This is the problem. You do not know what normal behavior is and you should not have a young woman who may have some problems in your home.
 
Oh, and seriously, who would feel "hurt" that someone accidentally walked in on them naked. Embarrassed or awkward, yes. Hurt? No. That is not hurtful if it is unintentional. Good grief, man, there is so much wrong in this whole thing that we can't even cover all the points.
 
If people think this young 17 yrs old girl did not tell fellow students at her school about this incident, I have a bridge to sell you.
 
... and not to minimize the proper criticism leveled at the Biker, this girl is going to be a problem in Biker's house. A 17 year old girl who hangs around and peers has little to no shame.

Again, it is Biker's responsibility. Unfortunately the problem is only exacerbated by the 17 year old's interest.
 
As usual, Aleshanee gets to the crux of the matter. This is, most likely, a damaged girl who will not be responding properly. She's correct about Biker also, based on his past posts. Great analysis.
 
Excelsior said:
As usual, Aleshanee gets to the crux of the matter. This is, most likely, a damaged girl who will not be responding properly. She's correct about Biker also, based on his past posts. Great analysis.
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yes hopefully the powers that be here, that have his info have already reported this to the proper authorities, and. Not just turned a blind to this!
 
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