Mrs. Hyles and the kids

[Sherryh]

redeemed , That's why we need to know a life skill that will help feed us. I have family that married young and the ladies have no extended education..............it kills me. They are young and laugh about it..........which is sad. You need an vocation or education to get a good job...

 

[OZZY]

I'm confused.  Didn't you read Voyle Glover's book?  I believe Linda.  I don't believe Cindy anymore.

Most people that read Glover's tripe are confused

 

[BALAAM]

At this point I do not have an issue with it I guess.

Well, some of us actually WORK for our money. I know, I know...it's not fair to expect her to work, she's never held a job in her life, and especially not in the *gasp* world.

I find it wildly ironic that both she and her daughter warn women against the tremendous perils of working in the *gasp* world, saying it will ruin your testimony and wreck your life...yet those of us who work in the *gasp* world pay the way for those who find it so wicked a thing...

I've been away from the IFB for many years.  I guess I shouldn't be too shocked by anything that happens, but I'm amazed they taught that there were "tremendous perils working in the world".  My goodness, there were perils going on behind closed doors with the preacher!!

I am of the opinion that every person should have some marketable skill.  What happens to a woman whose husband gets ill and can't work or what happens if the woman never marries??  .....

I have heard this taught by both Cindy Schaap and Jacklyn. And it used to be that a widow  or single married lady in fbch could get a job at one of the schools or the church but the recession has changed a lot of that. And not just for women.

I have seen more than a few men who taught in the school systems who lost their jobs and they found that either they move their families for minimum wage jobs teaching in other church schools or change careers.

 

[RAIDER]

I remember being around Linda at the funeral and events surrounding it....there is something not right with that lady.

or

My sister was at HAC in the early/mid '80s.  She was in a class that Linda had a part in teaching.  She said Linda was a bit strange and a drama queen for sure.

 

[Binaca Chugger]

I would like to add some thought for discussion concerning Linda and her open letter.  First, let me give a little background:

Bro. Hyles was my friend, so my opinion may be biased.  Though I grew up at FBCH, I do not recall ever meeting Linda.  My wife was a PK, so we are well aware of the long lasting effects of the "Keeping up appearance" mentality.

Very few people are at home who they are in public.  If you find such a pastor, you have found a unique situation and I would guess you are part of a small church.  Pride of position and power usually prevent leaders of large groups to let people see their own feet of clay.  Bro. Hyles was out of town more than he was home.  One can only assume that the family dynamics were different when he was home than when he was gone.  It seems each member of the family was going through stress of the IFB paparazzi (HACkers) and handling the stress in different manners.  Quite evidently, Bro. Hyles sacrificed his family on the altar of his ministry.

From reading the open letter, it appears Linda is still hurting.  It appears as though she is taking a humanistic approach to healing: retaliation rather than forgiveness. 

She speaks kindly of those who reached out to her as a youth to bring readers in.  She rebukes the obvious crime to gain respect of the reader.  She apologizes for abuses of which she is not party to gain trust of the reader.  She entices the reader with a secret knowledge of behind the scenes information which will be available in her forthcoming book.  Sounds like an expertly crafted press release to generate excitement and anticipation to generate sales.  Could it be that all of this is really an effort to make a buck?  Could be, but how much could she really expect to make?  Could it be that this is her attempt to find meaning in life - saving others from what she hated?  More likely.

It seems as though her purpose is to destroy the reputation of the man who she feels is responsible for destroying her childhood and subsequently, most of her life.  There appears to be some real personal motivation to help others escape the drama that she endured as a child.  Some people in these cases put their own tale together from memories to help them make sense of their past - like George Costanza told Jerry Seinfeld: "It's not a lie, if you believe it."  Have you ever had a family reunion and told a story from your childhood, only to find out that everyone in the family has a different recollection of the event?  It is quite possible for one to piece together memories to form a storyline that is personally believed and yet not accurate.  Remember: "It's not a lie, if you believe it."  Or is it?

Here's the problem with Linda's tales:  Embellishment.  This is the same reason so many people could not trust the word of the other "whistle-blowers."  Their stories are filled with misrepresentations, untruths and exaggerations.  When you embellish your story to drive home your point, your point has lost its point.  Since there are so many untruths and since there is so much intent to mislead on subjects that are known, how are we supposed to believe the part of the story to which only the storyteller has information?  In such cases, the character witness has destroyed his own character and thereby cannot be trusted.

Some PK's have found the love of God and His grace to overcome the bitterness of being robbed of childhood and having had the family sacrificed on the altar of ministry.  Some PK's have found their Father's forgiveness to give for their father's misguided love of ministry over love of family.  There is a path to healing that does not include malice towards the dead with intent of financial gain.

 

[Norefund]

Can I offer up another possibility? In Linda's TED talk, the portion everyone objects to is the 50,000 tithing members and the ownership of all the buildings. At one time, the church claimed membership of 50,000 but I doubt all of them were tithing if that number is even close to accurate (we have all seen IFB math at work). The ownership of the buildings part is a bit of an exaggeration legally but I'm not sure it is much of an exaggeration in practice. Was there anything about any building that wasn't or couldn't be controlled by JH? Was he ever turned down on a purchase of building request?

That isn't even the possibility I am speaking of. Has anyone here ever experienced stage fright? I have. I remember how facts and figures were so difficult to get right under those conditions. This is all my opinion, but in looking at her breathing pattern and the pauses she takes, it looks like she may be trying to steady herself. If that's true, she may have had great anxiety speaking in public. Linda was quite reserved and shy as a teen and usually those years are pretty formative.

Anyway, I don't doubt the gist of her story at all.

 

[prophet]

My father sat on the deacon board for several shifts during that time, and yes Jack Hyles was told 'no' more than once.  Surprisingly, the one who attacked the other deacons for 'disloyalty', when they offered their veto, was none other than Vic Nischik.

Anishinabe

 

[RAIDER]

Here's the problem with Linda's tales:  Embellishment.  This is the same reason so many people could not trust the word of the other "whistle-blowers."  Their stories are filled with misrepresentations, untruths and exaggerations.  When you embellish your story to drive home your point, your point has lost its point.  Since there are so many untruths and since there is so much intent to mislead on subjects that are known, how are we supposed to believe the part of the story to which only the storyteller has information?  In such cases, the character witness has destroyed his own character and thereby cannot be trusted.

Agreed!  How many of us would respect a preacher/teacher who told two or three known lies in their sermon/lecture?  Linda would have been better served to speak only of things that no one could disprove.

 

[RAIDER]

B.C.

Would you use the same logic regarding embellishments with Bro. Hyles' sermons?  Just curious.

Yes, I would.  If I were listening to Dr. Hyles preach and in his sermon I heard him tell obvious lies, I would have issues. 

 

[Norefund]

B.C.

Would you use the same logic regarding embellishments with Bro. Hyles' sermons?  Just curious.

Yes, I would.  If I were listening to Dr. Hyles preach and in his sermon I heard him tell obvious lies, I would have issues.

When I was growing up in the church, JH used to tell a story about how one time David would not eat his green beans and JH had to break his will. He concludes the story by saying that green beans are now David's favorite food. I heard this story many times and some of you older folks have also.

After I left the church, I returned for a visit - mostly to please family members that still attend. This was after the whole world knew about David and he had been banished from FBC for the 2nd time. Low and behold, JH told the same green bean story substituting Cindy into the story. My loved ones smiled and laughed as if they were hearing it for the first time. They acted as if the story had never been told about David.

Two possibilities. 1. David and Cindy had the exact same experience, or 2. JH lied because it was convenient to do so. Substituting Cindy's name allowed him to tell the story, look awesome as a parent and leader, and avoid the whole messy Dave reference.

I'm going with possibility number 2.

 

[myeyesareopen]

Flash Forward: Jack Schaap told a strikingly similar story, starring himself as the boy whose will needed breaking, and a bowl of oatmeal as the tool his mom would use to accomplish the task...

 

[Norefund]

Coincidence or "embellishment?" You be the judge.

 

[RAIDER]

Two possibilities. 1. David and Cindy had the exact same experience, or 2. JH lied because it was convenient to do so. Substituting Cindy's name allowed him to tell the story, look awesome as a parent and leader, and avoid the whole messy Dave reference.

I'm going with possibility number 2.

And why would you go with possibility #2?

 

[Norefund]

I just think it's the more likely explanation. The possibility exists that both Cindy and Dave had the same experience but you would have thought that would have come up in the story. "Hey, this happened with multiple kids in my family."

Did you ever hear the story told both ways? If so, what did you think?

 

[RAIDER]

I just think it's the more likely explanation. The possibility exists that both Cindy and Dave had the same experience but you would have thought that would have come up in the story. "Hey, this happened with multiple kids in my family."

Did you ever hear the story told both ways? If so, what did you think?

I actually don't remember hearing either one of them.  It seems like I remember Dr. Hyles talking about himself of one of the kids hating what he called "english peas".  After eating them for a period of time they became a favorite.

How about the rest of you Hackers?  Do you remember any of these stories?

 

[16KJV11]

I just think it's the more likely explanation. The possibility exists that both Cindy and Dave had the same experience but you would have thought that would have come up in the story. "Hey, this happened with multiple kids in my family."

Did you ever hear the story told both ways? If so, what did you think?

Raider never heard much of what Dr. Hyles said, he was too busy playing footsy with CF and trying to hold hands with Teri at the same time!

 

[RAIDER]

Raider never heard much of what Dr. Hyles said, he was too busy playing footsy with CF and trying to hold hands with Teri at the same time!

That would be like messing with a bear and a lion!

 

[kaba]

Secrets abound at HAC/FBC. Hyles affair, Ballenger (sp?) molesting, Comb's insanity, McSpadden's tunnel, Casteel's affair, Dave and his sex addition!!, Evan's selling his daughter for position! And the list could go on. Something doesn't smell right. Glad to be gone!

 

[patriotic]

I just think it's the more likely explanation. The possibility exists that both Cindy and Dave had the same experience but you would have thought that would have come up in the story. "Hey, this happened with multiple kids in my family."

Did you ever hear the story told both ways? If so, what did you think?

I actually don't remember hearing either one of them.  It seems like I remember Dr. Hyles talking about himself of one of the kids hating what he called "english peas".  After eating them for a period of time they became a favorite.

How about the rest of you Hackers?  Do you remember any of these stories?

"Eat your ocra, son."

"But, momma, I don't like ocra." 

"I said, 'Eat your ocra, son.'"

"Why do I have to eat ocra if I don't like it momma?" 

"It's good for you, son." 

"Today, if you give me a choice between a T-bone steak and a bowl of ocra, I'll choose the ocra." 

 

[lnf]

I'm not a Hacker, but this is how I roll...

Butter beans...I could sit all night over a plate of them.  Finally, we came to an agreement...I had to eat 3 butterbeans, but I got to pick them.  I chose whole beans...and swallowed them just like that, after washing them off in the sink.  Chewing them would cause instant vomit.

Was my spirit broken? Probably not.  Did I learn to love butter beans?  Absolutely not!  To this day, lo these many years later, I will not serve them.  But the bright side is this...I can swallow any size horse pill without choking.

And somehow, I doubt those Hyles kids serve green beans, either.