Racial Dating Policies at Bible Colleges

ItinerantPreacher said:
The fact that the government assigns them legal rights means nothing, under certain circumstances, they will emancipate a 14 year old, doesn't make that 14 year old an adult, it simply gives them the rights of adulthood. The fact that the government allows this automatically for 18 year olds doesn't make them mature either.

Not just our gov't, but practically the entire world disagrees with you. 18 year olds are considered adults. Again, just because you disagree does not make it untrue.

And the IFBx's decision to baby 18 year olds does not justify their racist dating rules.
 
Tarheel Baptist said:
You miss the point of the thread...it's not about what it's about, it's a bash the fundys thread.
Declare yourself righteously indignant and move on..... :D

Actually, you miss the point of this thread.
Are these restrictions on inter-racial dating okay with you, Tarheel Baptist?
 
AmazedbyGrace said:
Tarheel Baptist said:
You miss the point of the thread...it's not about what it's about, it's a bash the fundys thread.
Declare yourself righteously indignant and move on..... :D

Actually, you miss the point of this thread.
Are these restrictions on inter-racial dating okay with you, Tarheel Baptist?

No, I don't miss the point!
The purpose of this thread mirrors that of most of your threads.

A 'restriction' of parental approval is fine with me...I had the same restriction as a student as did both of our daughters. And none of us attended IFB-X schools.

Our church family has many multi-racial couples, I have performed the marriage ceremonies of many multi-racial couples, so my opinions are not motivated by so called racism. As to 18 year olds being responsible adults...well in my experience that's laughable!
 
Tarheel Baptist said:
Our church family has many multi-racial couples, I have performed the marriage ceremonies of many multi-racial couples, so my opinions are not motivated by so called racism. As to 18 year olds being responsible adults...well in my experience that's laughable!

So... you just think multiracial relationships are okay as long as parents approve? That's what I basically get from your responses.

Then you wouldn't have a problem with said school requiring prior approval from parents for any 18 year old to date anyone? or do you see a difference?
 
AmazedbyGrace said:
ItinerantPreacher said:
The fact that the government assigns them legal rights means nothing, under certain circumstances, they will emancipate a 14 year old, doesn't make that 14 year old an adult, it simply gives them the rights of adulthood. The fact that the government allows this automatically for 18 year olds doesn't make them mature either.

Not just our gov't, but practically the entire world disagrees with you. 18 year olds are considered adults. Again, just because you disagree does not make it untrue.

And the IFBx's decision to baby 18 year olds does not justify their racist dating rules.
As long as the world validates it by popular vote, it must be so.

Age of majority, salvation, homosexuality.
 
AmazedbyGrace said:
ItinerantPreacher said:
The fact that the government assigns them legal rights means nothing, under certain circumstances, they will emancipate a 14 year old, doesn't make that 14 year old an adult, it simply gives them the rights of adulthood. The fact that the government allows this automatically for 18 year olds doesn't make them mature either.

Not just our gov't, but practically the entire world disagrees with you. 18 year olds are considered adults. Again, just because you disagree does not make it untrue.

And the IFBx's decision to baby 18 year olds does not justify their racist dating rules.

Not that Wikipedia is the source of all things correct, but I'm sure this has been on their site long enough to have been corrected.

Concerning Bar and Bat Mitzvahs...

According to Jewish law, when Jewish boys become 13 years old, they become accountable for their actions and become a bar mitzvah. A girl becomes a bat mitzvah at the age of 12 according to Orthodox and Conservative Jews, and at the age of 13 according to Reform Jews. Prior to reaching bar mitzvah, the child's parents hold the responsibility for the child's actions. After this age, the boys and girls bear their own responsibility for Jewish ritual law, tradition, and ethics, and are able to participate in all areas of Jewish community life.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bar_and_Bat_Mitzvah

So I'm guessing that Jewish children in biblical days were considered adults well before age 18.
 
Quick comments about the rest of these rules:

Young men may call for their dates 30 minutes before church services begin.

Young men are not to call for their dates at the dormitory before Sunday School.

Dating couples are not to loiter after the church services in the auditorium, college building, academy, or near the dormitories.

OK, I don't exactly get these three rules.  The first two seem needlessly formal (does the first mean no more than 30 minutes prior, or no less than?)  And why the haste to get people away from the buildings?

It's like the Powers That Be are saying, "OK, if you want to date, you can see each other at church. . . . OK, you've had your fun, you crazy kids, now get out."

There are no dating privileges for soul-winning or church ministries.

Not sure what this even means. If you see each other while on church ministry business, it doesn't count as a date?

Ladies are not permitted to ride in a car with men unless permission has been granted by the Administration.

Fair enough.

Couples are not to be together without prior administrative approval on Saturdays before lunch or on Sunday afternoons.

Why not? Since it's the weekend, I assume it's free time. (Or not-so-free time, by the look of it.)

On college-wide activities, dating couples must remain in the presence of a third person at all times.

Fair enough.

Students are not allowed to date Temple Baptist Academy students prior to their junior or senior year in high school.

Fair enough.

Students who serve in the youth ministry of Temple Baptist Church are not allowed to date teens in that youth group.

Not only a good rule, but one that could be taken farther. If you are old and mature enough to be in a position of leadership in a youth ministry, you probably shouldn't be dating any youth, whether in or out fo your particular group. That's just creepy.

Interracial dating must be approved in writing and verbally by the parents of both students.

This satanic idiocy has already been adequately discussed.

Dorm students my not date an off-campus student or someone who is not a Crown College student.

So am I allowed to still have a girl back home, or will she be receiving an official Dear John letter on school letterhead?
 
Tarheel Baptist said:
As to 18 year olds being responsible adults...well in my experience that's laughable!

Whether they are responsible or not, they are adults and should be able to make their own choices, whether they be mistakes or not.

My kids know that once they graduate high school, they are on their own. We will house and feed them as long as they remain in college but every other bill they have will be theirs to pay, including all college tuition/expenses.

My son is 20 and decided he wanted to drop second semester of this school year because of a job promotion he wanted to master. I didn't have to ask him to leave because he decided to move out on his own before dropping the semester. Now he is fully supporting himself and gladly so.

My daughter is 18 and in college and living at home. She says she wants to get an apartment closer to the campus next fall semester. She is free to go and if she wants to move in with a guy, that will be on her. (She is not that type of girl, BTW. :) ) They have been ingrained with a moral code and have been making most of their decisions/consequences since they began their teen years.

As a parent, if they haven't grown enough to make ALL their decisions by 18, even if they may make some wrong ones, I have failed as a parent.
 
praise_yeshua said:
Tarheel Baptist said:
Our church family has many multi-racial couples, I have performed the marriage ceremonies of many multi-racial couples, so my opinions are not motivated by so called racism. As to 18 year olds being responsible adults...well in my experience that's laughable!

So... you just think multiracial relationships are okay as long as parents approve? That's what I basically get from your responses.

Then you wouldn't have a problem with said school requiring prior approval from parents for any 18 year old to date anyone? or do you see a difference?

I see nothing wrong, assuming the parents are responsible parents, with parental approval for dating period...which has been my family's experience in college and universities.

We wanted to approve of both our daughters dating relationships when they came of dating age.
Do you not care who your children date?
 
praise_yeshua said:
Tarheel Baptist said:
Our church family has many multi-racial couples, I have performed the marriage ceremonies of many multi-racial couples, so my opinions are not motivated by so called racism. As to 18 year olds being responsible adults...well in my experience that's laughable!

So... you just think multiracial relationships are okay as long as parents approve? That's what I basically get from your responses.

Then you wouldn't have a problem with said school requiring prior approval from parents for any 18 year old to date anyone? or do you see a difference?
I wouldn't have a problem with it, I would require it.

Where do we get the Biblical, I said Biblical, I repeat Biblical premise for ignoring parents in lifes decisions?
 
Smellin Coffee said:
Tarheel Baptist said:
As to 18 year olds being responsible adults...well in my experience that's laughable!

Whether they are responsible or not, they are adults and should be able to make their own choices, whether they be mistakes or not.

My kids know that once they graduate high school, they are on their own. We will house and feed them as long as they remain in college but every other bill they have will be theirs to pay, including all college tuition/expenses.

My son is 20 and decided he wanted to drop second semester of this school year because of a job promotion he wanted to master. I didn't have to ask him to leave because he decided to move out on his own before dropping the semester. Now he is fully supporting himself and gladly so.

My daughter is 18 and in college and living at home. She says she wants to get an apartment closer to the campus next fall semester. She is free to go and if she wants to move in with a guy, that will be on her. (She is not that type of girl, BTW. :) ) They have been ingrained with a moral code and have been making most of their decisions/consequences since they began their teen years.

As a parent, if they haven't grown enough to make ALL their decisions by 18, even if they may make some wrong ones, I have failed as a parent.

That's wonderful.
 
aleshanee said:
Tarheel Baptist said:
AmazedbyGrace said:
Tarheel Baptist said:
You miss the point of the thread...it's not about what it's about, it's a bash the fundys thread.
Declare yourself righteously indignant and move on..... :D

Actually, you miss the point of this thread.
Are these restrictions on inter-racial dating okay with you, Tarheel Baptist?

No, I don't miss the point!
The purpose of this thread mirrors that of most of your threads.

A 'restriction' of parental approval is fine with me...I had the same restriction as a student as did both of our daughters. And none of us attended IFB-X schools.

so..... are you saying you and your daughters could have dated a high school student while in college without parental permission..... but written permission from a parent would have been required to date someone of a different race?.......  ??? ....... the issue was not about requiring parental permission per se'.... it was about the inconsistency that singled out dating relationships between people of different races but left everything else unaddressed ......

Our church family has many multi-racial couples, I have performed the marriage ceremonies of many multi-racial couples, so my opinions are not motivated by so called racism. As to 18 year olds being responsible adults...well in my experience that's laughable!

and i believe you on that account...... i also appreciate the ministry you do for the less fortunate members of your community........ but i feel you might be overlooking something here lashing out against what you want to believe is just a broad brush attack on fundamentalism again.......... but it;s not the case........ policies like the one posted in the op of this thread are one of the reasons fundamentalist colleges attract such criticisms..... and the twisting and spinning they do in order to defend those policies is why the criticism then turns to condemnations.....

When I was in college, as a freshman, I had to have parental consent to date. Period.
So did my two daughters when they were freshmen in Christian Schools.

I saw/see nothing wrong with that rule at all!
 
Ransom said:
Quick comments about the rest of these rules:

Young men may call for their dates 30 minutes before church services begin.

Young men are not to call for their dates at the dormitory before Sunday School.

Dating couples are not to loiter after the church services in the auditorium, college building, academy, or near the dormitories.

OK, I don't exactly get these three rules.  The first two seem needlessly formal (does the first mean no more than 30 minutes prior, or no less than?)  And why the haste to get people away from the buildings?
- It means no more than, an attempt to stop young couples from turning Church Services into an extra date night. Same with Sunday School. There is nothing wrong with a young man saying hello and walking a young lady to her class, what they are trying to prevent is him walking her to her class 1.5 hours before it starts, thereby creating a date out of it. Also consider these rules are for dormitory students who do not have to drive to get there. They got up at 7, had breakfast, now they have 2 hours before class starts. Same with loitering. They are not talking about 5, 10, 15 minutes of exchanging pleasantries after church, they are talking about the dating couples who are hanging on and somone has to kick them out so they can shut the lights off in the auditorium.
It's like the Powers That Be are saying, "OK, if you want to date, you can see each other at church. . . . OK, you've had your fun, you crazy kids, now get out."

There are no dating privileges for soul-winning or church ministries.

Not sure what this even means. If you see each other while on church ministry business, it doesn't count as a date?
- No, it means you cant turn visitation into date night. Remember I said in an earlier post this is not mature young people, these are rules for immature young people who would use visitation as an excuse to simply spend more time together with no thought of spiritual service.
Ladies are not permitted to ride in a car with men unless permission has been granted by the Administration.

Fair enough.

Couples are not to be together without prior administrative approval on Saturdays before lunch or on Sunday afternoons.

Why not? Since it's the weekend, I assume it's free time. (Or not-so-free time, by the look of it.)
- It is free time, but hanging out with your date without approval is the problem.
On college-wide activities, dating couples must remain in the presence of a third person at all times.

Fair enough.

Students are not allowed to date Temple Baptist Academy students prior to their junior or senior year in high school.

Fair enough.

Students who serve in the youth ministry of Temple Baptist Church are not allowed to date teens in that youth group.

Not only a good rule, but one that could be taken farther. If you are old and mature enough to be in a position of leadership in a youth ministry, you probably shouldn't be dating any youth, whether in or out fo your particular group. That's just creepy.

Interracial dating must be approved in writing and verbally by the parents of both students.

This satanic idiocy has already been adequately discussed.

Dorm students my not date an off-campus student or someone who is not a Crown College student.

So am I allowed to still have a girl back home, or will she be receiving an official Dear John letter on school letterhead?
- Not sure where this one is headed. I will say this, there is an adage "the students write the rules", in other words rules get written in response to problems that arise. Often rules written to address a specific issue that no longer exists fail to get dropped and you get a bloated book of odd rules.
 
Tarheel Baptist said:
Recovering IFB said:
Tarheel Baptist said:
Reformed Guy said:
Given that there's a few thousand other options for college in the U.S.- nearly all of which libertinism can be practiced with abandon- I wouldn't get my knickers in a bunch over a handful that actually have some rules.

If you don't like the rules, don't go there.

You miss the point of the thread...it's not about what it's about, it's a bash the fundys thread.
Declare yourself righteously indignant and move on..... :D
Feeling convicted?
No, it's about them hiding behind "parental consent" to mask their racism. But hey, it's ok to date high school girls without parental consent, right?

Project much?  ;)
And parental consent is not confined to fundamentalist schools.
We had a similar rule at Liberty when I was there, I believe...don't know what it is now.
And the SBC college my youngest daughter attended required parental consent for dating of any kind!

But it's ok to date high school girls right? But need mommy and daddy's permission to date out of race? Even though they are adults. You can die for country, but get parents permission to date a person of color? Got it  ;D
 
Tarheel Baptist said:
praise_yeshua said:
Tarheel Baptist said:
Our church family has many multi-racial couples, I have performed the marriage ceremonies of many multi-racial couples, so my opinions are not motivated by so called racism. As to 18 year olds being responsible adults...well in my experience that's laughable!

So... you just think multiracial relationships are okay as long as parents approve? That's what I basically get from your responses.

Then you wouldn't have a problem with said school requiring prior approval from parents for any 18 year old to date anyone? or do you see a difference?

I see nothing wrong, assuming the parents are responsible parents, with parental approval for dating period...which has been my family's experience in college and universities.

We wanted to approve of both our daughters dating relationships when they came of dating age.
Do you not care who your children date?

I'm just saying they rules should be applied evenly. If you don't, then there is plenty of room to see a specific group of people being targeted. WHICH, is one of the reason, I don't generally like such rules. I prefer to handle things based on a case by case model.

Its rather obvious that a particular group of people were targeted with this rule.
 
Recovering IFB said:
Tarheel Baptist said:
Recovering IFB said:
Tarheel Baptist said:
Reformed Guy said:
Given that there's a few thousand other options for college in the U.S.- nearly all of which libertinism can be practiced with abandon- I wouldn't get my knickers in a bunch over a handful that actually have some rules.

If you don't like the rules, don't go there.

You miss the point of the thread...it's not about what it's about, it's a bash the fundys thread.
Declare yourself righteously indignant and move on..... :D
Feeling convicted?
No, it's about them hiding behind "parental consent" to mask their racism. But hey, it's ok to date high school girls without parental consent, right?

Project much?  ;)
And parental consent is not confined to fundamentalist schools.
We had a similar rule at Liberty when I was there, I believe...don't know what it is now.
And the SBC college my youngest daughter attended required parental consent for dating of any kind!

But it's ok to date high school girls right? But need mommy and daddy's permission to date out of race? Even though they are adults. You can die for country, but get parents permission to date a person of color? Got it  ;D

What?
I'm not arguing any of that, Einstein!

If they're in the army, they probably don't need anyone's permission to date or hire a prostitute if they want.
I'm saying that it is not unreasonable for a Bible College to require parental consent for freshmen to date. IMO!
If you don't agree, don't send your kids there.
 
ItinerantPreacher said:
It means no more than, an attempt to stop young couples from turning Church Services into an extra date night.

OK, so it is about what counts as a date.  So that just raises another question: Why does the college care whether a man and woman are on a date or not? Are they keeping score?

Same with Sunday School. There is nothing wrong with a young man saying hello and walking a young lady to her class, what they are trying to prevent is him walking her to her class 1.5 hours before it starts, thereby creating a date out of it.

Do they have something else they are supposed to be doing in that 1.5 hours? If not, what's the problem, if they don't break the other rules about being alone together etc.?

As for "creating a date out of it," see above.

No, it means you cant turn visitation into date night.

If a dating couple are not both involved in the same ministry at the same time, they can't be with each other, hence no problem. If they are both involved in the same ministry, then they are together, and they will likely be working, talking, and being together as part of the church's business.

So, yes, it is about what does or does not count as a date.

Remember I said in an earlier post this is not mature young people, these are rules for immature young people who would use visitation as an excuse to simply spend more time together with no thought of spiritual service.

However you personally happen to feel about it, if they are over 18, they are of age and legally entitled to make these decisions for themselves.

It is free time, but hanging out with your date without approval is the problem.

So it's not actually free time, because it's being regulated, so it must be "free" time.

And again, if the couple isn't breaking any of the other rules, what's the problem?

Not sure where this one is headed.

It wasn't a hard question, and it wasn't a trick question.

What if a Crown student is still dating his high-school sweetheart when he leaves for college? Does that fit the definition of dating someone who is "not a Crown College student"? Is he breaking the rules unless he breaks it off with her?
 
I think that the rules made to "protect" the kids, actually hinder their growth. How do you expect adults to act if every aspect of the college days are just an extension of living with mom and dad? It is like the schools have to govern every aspect of their lives and not let the kids make mistakes. What happens when they get into the real world where mommy and daddy or the administration is not their to direct them, then what?
If the people were raised in a Bible believing home, then you have given them the proper instructions, the trust God to work in them.
Funny, the people who cry for Americans losing their freedoms are the quickest ones to squelch the freedoms of college age adults.
 
Tarheel Baptist said:
I'm saying that it is not unreasonable for a Bible College to require parental consent for freshmen to date.

But they don't require permission, if they're both good white kids.  That's just for the rebellious race traitors who want to miscegenate.
 
Tarheel Baptist said:
Recovering IFB said:
Tarheel Baptist said:
Recovering IFB said:
Tarheel Baptist said:
Reformed Guy said:
Given that there's a few thousand other options for college in the U.S.- nearly all of which libertinism can be practiced with abandon- I wouldn't get my knickers in a bunch over a handful that actually have some rules.

If you don't like the rules, don't go there.

You miss the point of the thread...it's not about what it's about, it's a bash the fundys thread.
Declare yourself righteously indignant and move on..... :D
Feeling convicted?
No, it's about them hiding behind "parental consent" to mask their racism. But hey, it's ok to date high school girls without parental consent, right?

Project much?  ;)
And parental consent is not confined to fundamentalist schools.
We had a similar rule at Liberty when I was there, I believe...don't know what it is now.
And the SBC college my youngest daughter attended required parental consent for dating of any kind!

But it's ok to date high school girls right? But need mommy and daddy's permission to date out of race? Even though they are adults. You can die for country, but get parents permission to date a person of color? Got it  ;D

What?
I'm not arguing any of that, Einstein!

If they're in the army, they probably don't need anyone's permission to date or hire a prostitute if they want.
I'm saying that it is not unreasonable for a Bible College to require parental consent for freshmen to date. IMO!
If you don't agree, don't send your kids there.
No, your protecting their choice to hide behind parental consent to mask their fascist belief.
And beleive me, I definatly won't be sending my kids there.
I'm really glad to see that you stopped the name calling, your congregation must be so proud to call you Pastor
 
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