The OFFICIAL "You might be a Hacker if...." thread!

YMBA HACker if.......

you are planting a church, have no staff, but your church website has your title listed as LEAD PASTOR.
 
YMBAHI...

at church you look forward to talking about the delegates of Cruz more than the disciples of Christ.
 
YMBAHI...

your decision to support Trump is because he reminds you of your old division leader and his rallies remind you of your Saturday morning division meetings!  :D
 
YMBAHI...

your desire is to have everyone show a valid state issued ID and go through something akin to a TSA patdown screening before anyone can access a public restroom.  :eek:
 
YMBAHI...

you need to cobble together a sermon for tonight's crowd about your faith being in God's House instead of the White House!
 
YMBAHI...

you will do your best to distance yourself from your candidate that suddenly quit after insisting to everyone many times that he was in the race through the convention.
 
Baptist City Holdout said:
YMBA HACker if.......

you are planting a church, have no staff, but your church website has your title listed as LEAD POSTOR.
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Nice.
 
Saw a HACker van today on 41.

ebe4f6a2f5123a1141e78c1b3ff5cc27.jpg
 
qwerty said:
Saw a HACker van today on 41.

ebe4f6a2f5123a1141e78c1b3ff5cc27.jpg
Click to expand...
Did you knock on the window, and inform them that Ruckman died?

earnestly contend

 
qwerty said:
prophet said:
qwerty said:
Saw a HACker van today on 41.

ebe4f6a2f5123a1141e78c1b3ff5cc27.jpg
Click to expand...
Did you knock on the window, and inform them that Ruckman died?

earnestly contend
Click to expand...
I threw a Chick Tract at him.
Click to expand...
Only if he was your waiter, in lieu of a tip, I hope!!?



earnestly contend

 
qwerty said:
Saw a HACker van today on 41.

ebe4f6a2f5123a1141e78c1b3ff5cc27.jpg
Click to expand...

You know it's a Hacker not by the bumper sticker, but rather the bumper sticker being applied to the side of the car.
 
TRUE STORY!

You pastor a small church in the country. After a couple of years you have about a dozen relatives come to help you 'build' the church. After several years you have grown that thing from  80 to 20. Because of the backslidden heathen people in the area who just don't want a bible believing bible preaching soul-winning (?) KJV only church you take a job to help with the income. After 2 weeks you quit because it interferes with your 'pastoral duties'. BTW, my dad has been in and out of the hospital several times and his pastor did not come to visit etc. He says he kind of forgot. But, he is a fundamentalist. Save us from these kinds of people!!
 
BALAAM said:
TRUE STORY!

You pastor a small church in the country. After a couple of years you have about a dozen relatives come to help you 'build' the church. After several years you have grown that thing from  80 to 20. Because of the backslidden heathen people in the area who just don't want a bible believing bible preaching soul-winning (?) KJV only church you take a job to help with the income. After 2 weeks you quit because it interferes with your 'pastoral duties'. BTW, my dad has been in and out of the hospital several times and his pastor did not come to visit etc. He says he kind of forgot. But, he is a fundamentalist. Save us from these kinds of people!!
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I'm sorry, but I'm not getting it.  What has the country preacher who worked a job have to do with your dad (sorry to hear about that) and his pastor not visiting him?  Was his pastor working a second job?
 
Twisted said:
BALAAM said:
TRUE STORY!

You pastor a small church in the country. After a couple of years you have about a dozen relatives come to help you 'build' the church. After several years you have grown that thing from  80 to 20. Because of the backslidden heathen people in the area who just don't want a bible believing bible preaching soul-winning (?) KJV only church you take a job to help with the income. After 2 weeks you quit because it interferes with your 'pastoral duties'. BTW, my dad has been in and out of the hospital several times and his pastor did not come to visit etc. He says he kind of forgot. But, he is a fundamentalist. Save us from these kinds of people!!
Click to expand...

I'm sorry, but I'm not getting it.  What has the country preacher who worked a job have to do with your dad (sorry to hear about that) and his pastor not visiting him?  Was his pastor working a second job?
Click to expand...

Try to keep up. No, he does not work a second job. He has a weekly attendance of about 20. He got a job and quit because it interfered with his pastoral duties. What duties are those, do you ask? I don't know. My parents are almost 80 and can't attend anymore and don't give a pile of money anymore. So, I guess when you get to that point, you are dispensable. However, if there is snow to clear etc. he will come to their house because they pay him for that.
 
BALAAM said:
Twisted said:
BALAAM said:
TRUE STORY!

You pastor a small church in the country. After a couple of years you have about a dozen relatives come to help you 'build' the church. After several years you have grown that thing from  80 to 20. Because of the backslidden heathen people in the area who just don't want a bible believing bible preaching soul-winning (?) KJV only church you take a job to help with the income. After 2 weeks you quit because it interferes with your 'pastoral duties'. BTW, my dad has been in and out of the hospital several times and his pastor did not come to visit etc. He says he kind of forgot. But, he is a fundamentalist. Save us from these kinds of people!!
Click to expand...

I'm sorry, but I'm not getting it.  What has the country preacher who worked a job have to do with your dad (sorry to hear about that) and his pastor not visiting him?  Was his pastor working a second job?
Click to expand...

Try to keep up. No, he does not work a second job. He has a weekly attendance of about 20. He got a job and quit because it interfered with his pastoral duties. What duties are those, do you ask? I don't know. My parents are almost 80 and can't attend anymore and don't give a pile of money anymore. So, I guess when you get to that point, you are dispensable. However, if there is snow to clear etc. he will come to their house because they pay him for that.
Click to expand...

Got it.  Just one pastor in the story.  I thought there were two.

And yes, when you hit that "age" you are dispensable.  It's a tragic truth of getting old.
 
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