ScottJohnson said:
I suppose I should answer some of the questions that I raised yesterday. It is very hard for me to do so. After I shared my story yesterday I had a major panic attack and had to call my therapist who helped me through the day. As the panic went don I felt a sense of relief. No one came to my house, no one threatened me. It actually felt good.
I can only post at certain times of the day. My job has requirements that make unlimted internet access impossible. I suppose I should have waited till today, April 2, to tell my story, but my therapist said we had made a breakthrough and I should share my story. It probably seems odd to some that this would come on April 1. I suppose I found a kinship with Smellincoffee. Somebody had a story somewhat like mine. If it was my old bosses in security who tried to bug his dad then I believe him. The setup at BC sounds like something those guys would do.
I'll try to explain a little more what I saw in the secret room. My first reaction was shock. My next feeling was to get out of there quickly. The electrical boxes looked a lot like old telephone switchboards. A lot of wires came up from the floor and each wire was fed into the machine. There were knobs and dials at the top. I think that each station received sound from a different part of the college, church and HB. Where the wires came from I don't know. A main wire ran from the machine to the reel-to-reel machines. They were reel-to-reel machines. There were boxes of tapes laying next to each table. How many times have I wished I had taken some with me.
Perhaps I will share more later about how I have tried to recover. This is the hardest thing I have done in a long time, so please be patient with me.
Thanks for following up, Scott. You might get some backlash on the forum because you made it public but there really is nothing to fear from Hammond. If anybody had reason to be attacked, I'm sure I was on the list as a relative of mine was the editor for Glover's book.

During the 80s when I went back to the campus to pick up my yearbook from the previous year after graduation, I had to have a security guard escort me even though my parents were still on staff. About 10 years ago, I needed to get my transcripts and I was able to roam the halls with no issues, once I signed in at the front lobby. I never felt threatened. I felt judged by a couple who knew me, yes, but not threatened.
Glad to see you are getting counseling. If the therapist is a good one, you will probably work through various stages of grief. In the end, it should culminate in forgiving those who created that fear inside you. It might take years but that is the ultimate goal.
Pray for Hammond. Pray for those who hurt you. Pray for those who have been hurt. Pray for those who look back on history and learn from the crap we went through. Hang in there and share as you feel somewhat comfortable. You don't have to reply to every question so peel back the layers a little at a time as you are able.
God bless you!
Dan